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How can you explain your divorce to your children?

While the issues that lead to Charlotte couples seeking a divorce may primarily remain between them, the effects of their decisions often impact far more people than just the two of them. Scientific American reports that every year, 1.5 million children in the U.S. go through a divorce. While divorcing couples feel that it’s in their best interests to separate, explaining that to their children in a way that they can understand can be extremely difficult.

If you happen to find yourself in this situation, you’re no doubt are aware of the sensitivity of this topic. Yet while there’s never a guarantee that kids will take the news of their parents pending divorce well, there is advice available to help you in explaining the situation to them. 

  • Be mindful of their age and maturity: The divorce process can be very complex, with many elements that kids will find difficult to understand. Thus, you should ensure that you explain what’s happening using language and a tone that they can comprehend.
  • Stress that the decision had nothing to do with them: While children may find it difficult understanding affairs of the heart, you must emphasize that issues between you and your spouse led to this, and that they by no means contributed to the decision.
  • Avoid assigning blame: While you may harbor bitter feelings towards your spouse, he or she will likely continue to be a huge part of your children’s lives. Keep issues between the two of you, and encourage your children to show love and respect to your spouse as their parent, provided it is still warranted.

Having said all of this, don’t underestimate your children’s ability to comprehend the situation. In many cases, you may find that they deal with it much easier than you. 

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