Divorce After Military Retirement and What You Need to Know

When you’ve spent decades in the service, moving around the world, adapting to new assignments, and working through long separations, it’s easy to think the hardest part is behind you once you retire. But if you’re facing a divorce after military retirement, you already know that’s not always the case.

Divorce is rarely simple, but when military benefits and federal rules get involved, the stakes and the stress can climb fast. Here’s what you need to know to protect yourself, your rights, and your future.

How military retirement benefits factor in

Let’s start with the big one: your retirement pay. Under the Uniformed Services Former Spouses’ Protection Act (USFSPA), your military retirement pay can be divided in a divorce. It’s not automatic, though. The court decides whether your ex gets a portion, and how much.

Here’s the kicker: your former spouse doesn’t have to be married to you for 10 years to be entitled to a portion of your retirement. That “10/10 rule” you’ve probably heard about only determines whether the Department of Defense will pay your ex directly. The court can still award part of your pension even if you were married for a shorter time.

If the marriage overlapped with at least 10 years of military service, your ex can receive their share directly from Defense Finance and Accounting Service (DFAS). If not, you might have to make those payments yourself, which can add a layer of complication to an already emotional process.

What about VA disability and other benefits?

Here’s where things get even more complicated. VA disability compensation is considered separate from retirement pay and it’s not divisible in divorce. But here’s the nuance: if you waived part of your retirement to receive VA disability (as many do), that can reduce the amount your ex can claim.

That might sound like a loophole, but it’s not always a win. Courts may not divide VA disability directly, but they can consider the total financial picture — including any waived retirement pay — when making alimony or property decisions. You’ll want a lawyer who understands both military and civilian legal systems to help navigate this part.

You should also know that things like Tricare coverage, commissary access, and survivor benefits might still be available to your ex, depending on how long you were married and how long you served. It’s a delicate balance, and every detail matters.

Survivor Benefit Plan (SBP): a decision you can’t ignore

After divorce, you have to make a decision about the Survivor Benefit Plan. This is what allows your ex to continue receiving a portion of your retirement pay after your death. If it’s awarded in the divorce, you’ll need to elect “former spouse coverage” within one year.

If you don’t, your ex could lose that benefit entirely, and you could end up back in court. Some people try to avoid SBP because of the cost (it’s usually 6.5% of your gross retired pay), but it’s often worth it for peace of mind and closure.

Property division and military life

You already know that military life affects everything: housing, careers, and even social networks. So, it’s no surprise that property division can be messier than average, especially if you’ve lived in multiple states. North Carolina is an equitable distribution state, meaning the court divides marital property fairly, but not necessarily 50/50.

That includes things like:

• Retirement accounts and pensions
• The family home
• Vehicles, investments, and savings
• Debt accumulated during the marriage

The court looks beyond who earned more. They’ll look at the full picture, including non-financial contributions and sacrifices made for the marriage. If your spouse puts a career on hold to support your military service, that’s going to be a factor.

Custody and visitation with grown kids in mind

If you have children still living at home, custody can become one of the most emotional (and legally complex) parts of a military divorce. Retirement doesn’t mean you’re home all the time. You may still be involved in work that takes you away from home or even overseas.

Judges will prioritize the best interests of the child, and that means showing you’re a stable, present parent. If you’ve just transitioned to civilian life, you’ll need to show how you’re handling that shift and how it benefits your children. That can be as simple as showing that you’re working steadily, earning enough to support yourself and your child(ren) and that you have a stable home life.

Alimony and long-term financial planning

Alimony isn’t automatic in North Carolina, but if there’s a big gap in income or one spouse needs time to get back on their feet, the court may award spousal support. The length of the marriage and each person’s earning potential will factor in heavily.

If you’re the one paying alimony, retirement income counts, even if it feels like you’ve already earned it. This is why smart planning matters. Having a financial planner who understands military benefits can be just as important as hiring the right lawyer.

Why legal representation is critical

Military divorces go far beyond state laws. They intersect with federal rules, DFAS procedures, and sometimes even VA regulations. If your lawyer doesn’t know the ins and outs of how these systems work together, you’re more likely to miss something that could cost you.

You need someone who can:

• Break down what’s divisible and what’s not
• Help you navigate SBP elections and DFAS payments
• Advocate for your financial and parental rights
• Translate legal language into real-world decisions

It’s a lot. But you don’t have to do it alone.

An end to uncertainty

You’ve already been through a life of service, navigating duty stations, deployments, and uncertainty. Divorce after retirement is just one more challenge, but it’s one you can manage with the right guidance and preparation.

At Epperson Law Group, we understand how much is at stake. We can help you protect what you’ve earned, plan for what’s next, and move forward with clarity. If you’re thinking about divorce, or already in the middle of one, reach out today. We’re ready to help.